These eclectic eleven for sale by owner listings run the gamut from comically awful decor to head-tiltingly curious staging.

But the one thing they all have in common is that they’re sure to make you thankful this Thanksgiving that none of these listings are yours.

Below is our roundup of the 11 for sale by owner listings that are ready for roasting:

1. Talk about microfibers

Photo: forsalebyowner.com

Our first listing comes out of Lincoln, NE. This mobile home has it all — heat, central air, roof and siding, all in “good repair.” However, the $12,500 price tag reflects “some areas that need work.” A super-close up of the unit’s carpeting left us wondering if it was “in good repair” or “needed work.” Worst case scenario, the carpet pic makes a great cover photo on Facebook.

2. Worth a thousand words

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The next listing also hails from Lincoln, NE, and features only one photo (and it’s a screenshot from Google Maps). Sometimes, that is all you need. This “cute little house” supposedly has three-bedrooms, a huge fenced in yard and is “perfect for beginners.”

The owner states it’s “a lot bigger than it looks.” We’d hope so, otherwise we can’t possibly imagine it housing more than a couple of rooms, let alone multiple bedrooms and bathrooms. Maybe the homeowner could have included a few more interior photos? It is bargain priced at only $74,000, and the homeowner states they are “in no hurry to move.” We suspect that might a good thing.

3. Grading on a curve

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This three-bedroom, one-and-a-half-bath home is located in Boise, ID. It boasts an open floor plan, lots of natural light and updated LED lighting, and a “large newly seeded backyard.”

Photo: forsalebyowner.com

The homeowner makes no mention of the numerous curved walls and doorways in the home, courtesy of their poor photo taking skills. The curved effect ranges from subtle to fun-house mirror noticeable.

4. Bliss

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This “inviting” listing features a four-bedroom, three-bath home in Meridian, ID that has been “lovingly cared for.” The property comes with a vegetable garden, and the home itself has a pantry, 20 foot tall ceilings in parts, a fresh coat of paint and plenty of natural light.

And, judging from the photos, it also includes a terrier mix of some sort. The homeowner thoughtfully perched the pet on an office chair and said cheese, although the dog’s expression is fairly dull. Oh, and the canine’s photo caption? You guessed it — “bliss.”

5. Norman Bates was also into taxidermy

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This “cute, updated cottage” in Merrill, WI features one-bedroom, one-bathroom and a whole lot of character. Given the home’s decor, the homeowner is clearly a wildlife and taxidermy enthusiast. A shower curtain feature a bevy of Moose hangs in the bathroom, while a bear skin has claimed the couch in the living room. But most awkward of all is the taxidermy critter hanging on the wall. We have to say, we’re loving it.

6. Have you seen my mug?

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We head to Deerbrook, WI with our next listing, a tri-level three-bedroom, two-bath home near Neva Lake. And just in case you were more curious about Neva Lake, the homeowners included a map of it. Also of note, the homeowner’s coffeecup was brilliantly staged to be as eye-catching as possible.

Photo: forsalebyowner.com

The groovy shower curtain is also pretty gnarly, and there’s some pretty nauseating ugly wallpaper in an additional bathroom. The homeowner is “motivated, and ready to hear your offer.”

7. We’re not convinced

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Our next listing is for a cape-style three-bedroom home in Sharon, VT. A pellet stove provides heat and is “very comfortable for cold night in,” according to the homeowner. In the living room, the homeowner took it upon themselves to stencil realistic vines throughout to match a living potted plant that calls the area home. The result is less than convincing. The homeowner’s cat, seen lounging lazily on the sofa, agrees.

8. What’s your favorite scary movie?

Photo: forsalebyowner.com

This Richmond, VT home features a chef’s kitchen, a full basement for your “grandchildren or hobbies,” and is located in a secluded neighborhood — which could be a plus, depending on your basement hobbies. To further our horror movie line of thinking, a mask similar to the famous one used in the “Scream” film series hangs on the wall.

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Outside, the seating area made us chuckle. Either the kiddie table is yards away from the adults or that’s reserved for in-laws. You decide.

9. Artwork not included, thankfully

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“Let’s go for a swim,” screams the headline of this Warner Robins, GA listing. The five-bedroom, two-and-a-half-bath home is a real “STUNNER,” the homeowner says with equal excitement. To be fair, the home is quite lovely and the pool surely looks tempting if we weren’t days away from Thanksgiving. But it’s the owner’s taste in art that made us wince. Just take a look at the piece hanging in the bathroom if you don’t believe us.

10. Nearly, but no

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This listing also comes out of Warner, GA. And, we have to admit, the homeowner did a very admirable job staging and photographing their spacious three-bedroom home. But we quickly revoked their semi-pro status when we spotted a “super sized” fast food cup ruining an otherwise perfectly staged shot. This is why you should always hire a pro.

11. You pick, we can’t decide

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There are literally so many things wrong with our final listing that we couldn’t figure out where to begin. The two-bedroom home is located in Macon, GA and the homeowner has a “firm” price of $45,000, with a mathematically detailed description of why it’s firm. The fun begins with a of tent popped up next to a precarious looking above-ground pool in a woodsy-looking yard that practically screams lyme disease. We had to wonder, was that one of the two-bedrooms advertised in the listing?

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We were seeing a lot of red, literally, throughout the home. That is, when we could make out the photos. A living room photo was so dark all you could really discern was a splattering of red courtesy of a throw pillow, and nefarious looking black cat. We wondered for a moment what else might be lurking in the darkness of the room, and decided it was better to swipe to the next photo rather than further ponder that thought.

Photo: forsalebyowner.com

Meantime, the bathroom boasts a red door and a large towel airing out in the shower.

Photo: forsalebyowner.com

A blurry kitchen photo almost reveals red cabinetry, while two more cats with glowing eyes standout in a less than stellar photo of a bedroom with bright red walls.

Photo: forsalebyowner.com

An exterior photo also captures the homeowner’s car. You guessed correctly — it’s red.

Photo: forsalebyowner.com

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